Bloody Crafty

I am not a killer after all

One sort of odd thing about me is that I have a very real fear of rampant vegetation like ivy for instance and how it just grows all over and sprouts suckers to ruin the paint on my fence and house forcing me to use muscles to remove it.  Totally disgusting.  Sometimes even sprouting flowers and vegetables gross me out - I just want to see the finished product and then let it stop growing - at least before my eyes.  I blame this Sidney Sheldon book I read in high school that was all about the brains behind vegetation and it's sudden rise to take over the world.  Makes my skin crawl thinking about it.  So, obviously I'm not a crazy plant person and my thumbs are very peach - not green.  Therefore, if I acquire a plant or flower I never feel bad if it dies because I just blame this relationship - I mean they likely sense my fear.  Plus if they die then they won't take over my living room and strangle me in my sleep.  (I never said it was rational.)

Soooo - for my birthday in August I received the most beautiful orchid from my agency.   I tried everything to keep it alive - even researched online how much to water it and stuff.  But within six weeks all the petals fell away and i was left with a few leaves and some bare branches.  I even told people I killed it.  But then I noticed some weird finger looking things growing by the leaves.  It was the creepy sign of a plant growing.  So I gathered my fear and started watering it more regularly again.  Honestly I'm not sure what I was expecting.  But last week after returning from a short business trip, I literally gasped out loud when I saw THIS!  Now I have two flowers and they are as pretty as when they arrived.  Just in time for my half birthday next Wednesday!

The Way I Roll

Over the past few months as active Colorado-ans, we have done a lot of bike riding.  I think it is safe to still refer to me as an amateur mostly because I'm just not well outfitted (though I tend to be very well outfitted for golf and doubt I can be called much more than the cart driver or cocktail retriever).  One of the problems is my bike is kind of old.  It was a lovely gift from my dad in 1992.  Fifteen years ago it was soooo cool - a brand new Schwinn Montague - the folding bicycle.  It just slid into the Corolla trunk with no trouble!  And it probably still would - if I remembered HOW to fold it.  But it works - despite only having 15 gears - which would be fine except that a few weeks ago we were in Breckenridge and I had the pleasure of renting a new mountain bike with what felt like 400 gears - and those twisty gears are quite fancy.  Also by the way, that trail from Frisco to Breckenridge, although beautiful, is challenging despite what you might read.

Anyhoo, of the many things that my gear update might require, the most pressing is some sort of a bag or pouch.  I used to carry a big backpack to hold the camera, phone, money, water, first aid kit (gravity is lighter here) but I found that nylon+heat+friction = sweat.  Plus I used like 10% of the space in the pack -  I just need something small - and after a little research I discovered those are called Saddle Bags (who would guess that one day I'd be begging for more of those!).   But in a pinch this weekend, I finally became crafty - as I should.  I knew there was a reason I kept all those free Clinique bags.  And Laura will be very impressed with this saved plaid ribbon.  (See, I told you I'd use it!)  I'll let you compare - but please.  Saddle, schmaddle.  I'm sure the serious bikers would LOVE something more chic than the tiny little black bag that everyone else has.

Moving from Brown to Green

Spring in Denver has proven to be quite surprising. I actually think the weather was better in February – 50’ and sunny consistently was really nice. Spring can’t seem to break through at this altitude for some reason. We’ll have to breathtakingly perfect 75’ and sunny days followed by a day of snow – yes, SNOW and then a day of recovery. This includes clouds and I even saw rain for the first time last week. I find it all a bit distressing – especially on my wardrobe (which by the way does NOT adjust to jacked up weather conditions – the calendar says MAY for the love of all that is good).

However, in all this confusing amusement from the skies I discovered perhaps the most beautiful thing in nature that I’ve ever seen (however, I rarely find beauty in nature – it generally resides in the Saks shoe department). I was driving out of the valley in Golden and there was a cloud over me, but the sun was shining onto the hillside and it was like I went from black and white to Technicolor. It truly felt like the Wizard of Oz. That hillside has been white or brown since I known it over the past few months. At that moment, I realized that the ever-present sun that I rave about and enjoy endlessly actually represses the color of everything. Things actually fade in the sunlight – like the color of my hair. But when covered a bit by the clouds, the most amazing color that has been right before me for months was illuminated. 

I took pictures but they just didn’t do it justice. It makes me wonder what else I may have missed.

The Vote

I’m about a week late to talk about this but it seems like the whole election thing is still on the cultural radar – despite endless natural disasters and that war thing in Iraq - so I will go ahead and say what I should have said last Tuesday.

Damn it. I lived in  Indiana for 10 years and never got to really cast a noteworthy ballot – well not one that won anyway (thanks to you Mitch and your bus). Having a primary in May is about the most useless thing ever – who picked that date? Probably the same people that never wanted time to change time like the rest of the country. But anyhoo – this year Indiana was on the Democratic Party map. Seriously – five minutes after I left. IRRITATING.

If I would have had the chance – and technically since my house will apparently be on the market for eternity I could have filed an absentee ballot – but who would have thought it would matter – I was ready to vote for Obama. This is a change for me – I was a girl power Clinton supporter. Hillary is really a remarkably ambitious, brilliant woman. My thought – despite not agreeing with much of her politics – was that by elevating a woman to the highest power in the country, perhaps women could make an equal wage in this lifetime. But then she just started irritating me. First, by calling Obama an elitist and then the whole stupid gas tax holiday crap. She’s smart enough to know that’s not the answer but she’s openly pandering – or was. This week no one is talking about it.

Obama lost by 12,000 votes so my vote probably wouldn’t have changed the outcome. But the outcome does seem to have elevated Obama to the party’s choice. Oh, it’s going to be interesting.

How to Not Lose a Pen

It was brought to my attention that I rarely discuss crafts in my crafty blog, so yesterday I was reminded of a very good craft that I have all intentions of telling more people about though will doubtfully do on my own. 

I discovered very quickly when we moved here that someone has already told the proprietors of Denver this trick.  So don't scold me if you live here and see this all the time.  But the 360+ days of sun (today is one of the 40+ shitty ones by the way) apparently leads people to like flowers.  So all over the place where signing things is necessary - like at daycare as you sign in and out, the bank where you sign your life away, the salon where you sign receipts - instead of just having pens lying around for the eventual taking, they simply attach a big fake flower to the end of the pen and stick them in little buckets with marbles so it looks just like a bouquet of fake flowers.  Though not really a pretty bouquet - but I think it keeps people from stealing pens.  And it's kind of fun writing with a flower pen.  Someone has already provided directions on how to do this yourself in much greater detail - so check it out at your leisure.  OR if stolen writing utensils is really a problem for you, you could take the approach of the deli I visited on Monday and just take some duct tape and a big wooden spoon and voila!  For it is challenging (and far less desirable) to walk off with a two foot long wooden pen.

Witchy

Sorry I've been gone for a while.  I wish I had an excuse - but really life has been busy.  Though not uninspiring - I mean did anyone see the "Tricky" segment on AI tonight?  I might be blind and deaf for the next four months because of that.  So I won't talk about it - but I would like to briefly talk about my hair.  I am starting to think that perhaps it's too long.  I have been growing it for years mainly in reaction to the horrific decision to cut it short pre-first baby.  I look back and that was a seriously poor choice.  So for years I have kept growing it in hopes of being a Sports Illustrated model with my hair flowing over my boobs so I could appear on magazine covers and not feel like I'm exposing anything.  The longer that older hot celebrities grew their hair allowed me to keep going.  See Anniston, Hunter and Cox:   
        
Eric would prefer me have hair like a pixie - like really short. But I think longer makes me look a little younger.  Well, usually - but lately I've been worried about it looking like a witch.  Like is it too long?  My shower wall would say, "yes". 

But then just last week I found out that I wasn't the only one concerned with the length of hair.  The NFL is also quite concerned .  And despite the obvious less attractiveness of long coifed football players (compared to - well - me) - I have to say that I don't like the possible rule.  I'm more of an offensive person by nature - but that's a fairly decent defensive strategy.  "Just grab his hair."  And I would rather make rules against nude pantyhose and many other fashion faux pas - before I go after dreads of millionaires.  Sadly this does not solve any of my problems.  Or dreams of looking like a Sports Illustrated cover model.